958pm

Bobby has a lit mag.

Maybe a thousand ppl read it. Sounds kinda inflated but

at least that is what Bobby and the stupid fat bitch he gets to answer his emails tell everyone.

Really the stats hover around the same numbers as most blogs. Sure. Maybe there is a big day every time a new issue comes out like when alla the WRITERS put a link on their gay fucking sites and go oooh wheee tickly my nickly I am in the newest issue of Bobby-has-long-hair-and-got-an-MFA-in-Kerouac-from-BARD.

Imeanhowfuckingcoolisthat?

Right?

But here is the thing.

Bobby ain't no writer.

Or else he would not have a lit mag.

Simple math really.

And the halitosis overweight cuntface dyke who is AS BOUGIE AS OLD BOBBY with the rejection letters is really paying those kids back from high school who said she fucked a hotdog at a party in 7th grade every time she sends out a big ol fuck you to the [non] ass kissing asdf-ers. Isn't she?

Wait. What?

San Francisco?

Is that what the stupid fatso told you?

Man.

She went to HS in Omaha.

Her parents own a hardware store and are all about Jeezus.

But only on Sunday.

Natch.

And Bobby.

Never a day of pain except for when Alissa left him for the guy Bobby calls a nigger when no one else is around.

That fucking nigger.

NIGGER

NIGGER

NIGGER.

Plus it is not like Bobby knows anyone anyway.

Just some pretentious fucks from Twitter and Duotrope.

And for alla their money and Macs and Smart Cars and SKA CDs

and ass kissing and interviewing one another in hopes of piggybacking their way right to the very top of the unpaid typing game - the sad part is that they have never felt anything other than entitlement and ambition.

Sad.

I know.

Oh. I almost forgot.

Alla the bitches they fuck have split ends.

3.6.9. MR BLUESMITH ET AL.

DUDE

I

TOTALLY

WANT

ONE

OF

YOUR

CAFE

PRESS

TEES.

BLOW UP THE INTERNET.

I HAVE DEALT WITH SO MANY FUCKS ONLINE WHO I WOULD NOT SPEAK TO IN REAL LIFE IT MAKES ME HATE MYSELF.

WRITING.

NOT NUT RIDING.