0015

the dark the typing late
at night the memory of a frightened child crying a
fight that was not a fight words
held inside for so long and then exploded forward never
coming back i mean so much better this life than the old life
but still i mean he
held out his hand and was like hey what's up man
i
am not shaking your hand you piece of shit you
fucking lawn nigger the hero replied twenty black faces
instantly turned that way
don't talk to me like that said the white lawn nigger
what are you gonna do about it the hero said with a smirk
the woman came running down the hall children in tow
why
the fuck didn't you stay down there you
gotta fight for him or something NICE
REALLY
NICE IN FRONT OF YOUR KIDS
GOOD EXAMPLE
she was saying as the hero led his sobbing son down the hall
his arm around the boy the already
huge gulf widening with each step they
tricked me he wants to say the filthy pigs fucked behind my back and now they
live in my old house and sleep in the bed i paid for

everything in that place i paid for

he wants to say these things but he can't man he
says little dude i'm so sorry i have a bad temper and i made a big mistake
but inside he is elated fuck yeah that sorry hoe of a man tried to shake with me
I'M NOT SHAKING YOUR HAND YOU PIECE OF SHIT YOU FUCKING SYCOPHANT
DO YOU KNOW WHAT A SYCOPHANT IS DID THEY TEACH YOU THAT
WORD DURING YOUR ONE SEMESTER OF COLLEGE

nice
nice example
in front of your kids nice she said in her man voice

[a painful shrug]

yeah jerry springer yeah white trash like a motherfucker yeah real

flesh and blood and pain and wounds and brave.

a sobbing boy in the car. nodding yes or no answers. neon. rain falling on the windshield.

always that fucking rain.

alone up at night typing. the clock man. it won't fuckin move.