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I have been doing pushups
crazy amounts of pushups

while I am drunk mostly

and putting lotion on
my cock-flute-holes

and not having sex
(with another person)

and not writing
(anything good)

and wtf man the shit just wont come out for me either and why why why
okay
fuck it

time to jerk off and cry myself to sleep
while it rains outside
but without the crying
I will just lie there alone and tell myself I have no reason to be sad because I do not