Hi 33 and Otto and everyone else.

A long time ago like umm maybe eight or ten years ago or something like that I was reading (Surfing. You know you used to say it.) blogs and I found a blog that was hardly ever updated and its most recent entry was posted several months before I got there and the first lines of the post went something like, "Hello, everyone. I know I haven't updated in awhile..."

And for some reason reading that made me feel sad and lonely. Like I'd discovered a ghost town in that message on a blog that no one visited. A communication from a stranger I would never meet to other strangers. You know. The whole void thing.

But it also made me think about the Internet as something I could address. Plus, I loved writing and it made sense. Blogging was new and exciting and saying whateverthefuck I wanted made me feel so alive inside. More than the grad program I was enrolled in and the horrible management job I had at an unnamed Fortune 50 firm. And the drinking. And the drugs.

So I started talking to the Internet. At first, there was no one. For a really long time actually. But I hung in there and typed and typed and told truths and lies and cracked jokes to and at the ether. Typically, I had zero comments on every post.

And then eventually there were people.

And I made friends all around the world. I've only met a few in person tho (all bitches yuhhherrrdddmayyyy), and in fact I live with one now. I even call her bitch. She laughs. We have a nice place filled with crazy children and a laundry machine that is always running.

A really cool washing machine, btw. It has a window in the front and everything.

So I'm thinking that this thing has paid off for me. And man, prolly just like you, I got the jpeg collection to show for it.

But like, I can't ever look at them so don't worry if you sent some shit several years ago that you now wish you hadn't. All my old laptops have viruses and plus fuck Windows computers nawmean?

I love you, sweet babies. And I will always be here. I will never stop typing to you.

However, there may come a time when you no longer know my name. Shit changes on the Internet. But if that happens, keep in mind that you'll have done it to yourself and there will be no one else to blame.

So don't start none.

And there won't be none.