I completely forgot to tell you guys about the freaky thing that happened to me this morning on my way to work. It’s probably going to be impossible to explain, but I’m going to try. Bear with me.

So, I drive to work at the buttcrack of dawn so it’s still dark outside. It’s been raining here, so there are still some puddles on the roads, here and there, and in the dark they reflect the light from streetlamps and such.

The drive to work is uneventful until I put on my right turn signal as my freeway exit is approaching.

The offramp is a long one. It is just a straight ramp that extends at an angle off the main freeway for about 15-25 yards and then it goes downhill about 40 yards to an intersection where this homeless guy stands every other day, making me nervous that he will carjack me.

Okay. So as I veer off the freeway I immediately see that the offramp is completely flooded! The pavement ends into this black, reflective pool of water and I am heading right for it!

I immediately panic and try to figure out what to do. I am probably going 60 mph, the water looks fucking deep and I know that if I hit the water at the speed I’m going nothing good will come of it. There is no way around it. It’s filled the roadway from edge to edge.

I start to slow down.

That’s when my brain starts to kick in.

My brain is telling me, “Hey, wait a minute, how can the off ramp be completely underwater when the offramp is the top of a hill? The water would have to be 40 feet deep or some shit.”

While my brain is telling me this, I am putting on my brakes and adrenalin is fucking my shit awake cuz my car is headed for all that water. I’m checking my mirrors and, thankfully, nobody is behind me because they would probably slam into me when my car hits the water and spins out or slows down or stops or whatever. I start thinking about all those “What To Do When” type of shows and nothing is coming up for ‘driving into a flooded offramp’.

All of this panic and adrenalin and my brain attempting to chime in is happening over the course of maybe 10 seconds and that’s when, like magic, the flood disappears. All of a fucking sudden the offramp is normal, no water, just pavement, and my heart goes WHAT THE FUCK and I am now going maybe 40 mph, I’m braking still and I quickly look in my rear view to make sure nobody is taking the offramp at a normal speed of like, 60 and is going to slam into me because I AM BRAKING FOR AN IMAGINARY FLOOD THAT WAS THERE AND THEN WASN’T THERE.

I let off the brakes and coasted down the offramp and literally said, out loud, “What the fuck just happened?”

I swear, you guys, it was like a fucking hallucination. It was like a weird nightmare where you are like, Holy fuck I’m going to get into a car accident, and then you suddenly wake up, in a panic, but relieved because it wasn’t real.

But the weirdest part was, I was fucking AWAKE!

I still don’t know what to make of it. I’ve taken that offramp since June. Nothing like this had ever happened before. I felt like I was in some weird movie where the main character has their first glimpse into some alternate reality/parallel universe and as the movie progresses they get worse and worse and the main character thinks they are crazy and then yeah, plot story plot etc.