I have been listening to the Bird and the Bee a lot. I have been slowly freezing to death in Ohio. My heart was the first thing to go
You should hold me
I keep hearing doors slam in the hall. And then open. And then slam. 
The heater is going full blast in here it is like a soundtrack but I can't get warm. I was looking out the window earlier. The big fat white trash woman across the street only had one glove. She was shoveling snow very slowly and one-handed. There was a giant fake fur coat canvassed around her. She did not remove the snow fromthetop of her 95 Caddy.

Also. I told a guy at my retail job that sometimes I imagine having sex with the rich ladies who have me put desks and chairs and other heavy things into the back of their Lexus SUV's etc. I told the guy that I imagine having sex with these women in their cars. Only the thing is, I was lying. I'd never really imagined it until I said it. I think I'm just that funny. After I said it; however, I thought about it a lot. In my fantasies, the woman always comes first. Not like in real life where I nut super fast and they give me that are you fucking kidding look before saying that it's ok and they liked it.

Wait. Just so you know, that never happens. I was trying to appear vulnerable so you would like me more.

Or whatever. Fucking sue me. I'm a minuteman.