i have not been sleeping
which makes me dream while i am awake but at least i am no longer sleepwalking.
also i am so tired i don't answer ppl. i do that usually anyway but now i do it more. i think i am getting depressed from not sleeping. and angry. but like apathetic angry. which can't exist really. i also have really 
perverse thoughts like about drinking pee peed out by a pretty woman. ok. actually i don't. i'd have to be loaded to do that. and then i would only touch the pee. and plus  if it was pee squirted during a nite of boozing the pee would be clear anyway right. and plus who gives a damn if the pee sprays. i only gotta pay for the hotel room. not clean that motherfucker. that job is for some tiny dark woman who speaks a faster language than mine who came here looking for a better life. so pee on, pee-er.

actually i haven't had any perverse thoughts. or many anyhow. mostly my thoughts are about sleeping. and when i can get more than three hrs at a time. i feel like an emergency room doctor. only with no medical degree and future lucrative private practice. 
also regarding the pee slash hotel room scenario:i dont want to go to any hotels on acct of bedbugs. one time when i was single a female i know who is married wanted to have the sex withme. true story. we used to mess around back in the day. but i didn't want her to know where i lived as i knew she was married and oh btw to a guy who owns a karate school ok so i said she could not come over - totally hot lil number with the freckles and dishwater and blue eyes btw - back in the day i pushed her against the wall to kiss her in the student union - this was at like ten a.m. btw - and she immediately put her hand in my shorts and started jerking me off. which was awesome and we went and found an open conference room and did it doggie against a giant oak table and looked over the campus and a cleaning person came in and we didn't even stop and the cleaning person shuffled away after watching for several seconds that felt like tingly lifetimes just kidding. 
but yeah so anyway she said i could come to her house and i said no way i'm not having sex with you in your husband's house and she said we can fuck in the garage and luckily for her i am a totally good guy and also very afraid of ppl who own karate schools so i abstained. 

i'm not sure why i just told you that story. i am friends with her on fb. most girls i fucked longer than two weeks are not my friend on fb. in fact they mostly hate me but i tell them it's misdirected i tell them they should hate the game nawmean just kidding. i'm a complicated guy. i only want you until you want me. then it's curtains baby. 

hey. lemme ask you this. have you ever had a moment where you go omg i was totally fucking crazy for like decades and didn't even know it? like crazy crazy. i mean. not like eating shit crazy. but crazy nonetheless. becuz i totally did. 

it was liberating. like wearing a born free shirt at a Hag concert. Hag btw is the only word i capitalized in this entire post. 

i know i come on here a lot and harangue you. idk what to say about that. i want you to know that you're super special to me babies. no matter what you think i meant by what i said. swear to god i can't think of anyone else i'd rather take a nap with in a hammock on a beachfront hamptons property that goes for like 20k a week. and here is the kicker: the neighbor on one side is a coke dealer. the place on the other side is being rented by two brazilian singers and the hottest tgirl who ever escaped bangkok. even better: they all want to party with your pretty little self oh glory.

last but not least plz to put a 69 code after the number so i know it's you when you page

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